You’ve got yourself ready for your date, all spruced up and fresh-faced. You’ve got your best lines ready and agreed to meet somewhere you can both let your hair down a bit but still get to know each other properly. Why should you be putting any thought into what should just be a matter of letting your hair down? Well, the answer is simple – if you charge in like the proverbial bull in a china shop, the odds of your getting a second one can vanish in the first thirty seconds of you meeting.
So What’s The Secret?
Remind yourself of these simple tricks before and during your date and you can maximise your chances of your first date being simply the start of something wonderful.
- Time and again we hear the same thing – “oh, they were so fake!” People really can tell if you’re putting on an act, so don’t bother. Your mates might not be able to tell when you’re spinning them a line, but when you’re dating someone you’d better believe you’re under far more intense scrutiny. By and large, your body language won’t match up with how you’re trying to present yourself, and researchers have indicated that this provokes an unconscious disquiet in your date that completely undermines your efforts to sell yourself.
- Smile – it’s really that simple. Very few people want to be with someone who’s wrapped up in a cloud of misery. Do what you need to lighten your mood before you head out, whether that’s watching cartoons, putting on your favourite stand-up comedian’s DVD or just listening to something upbeat on the radio. If you’re in a good mood, your date will pick up on it and want to share in that joy.
- Look at her, but not in a creepy “I’m stalking you” way. Make it clear that you’re appreciating her company and noticing the care she’s taken when getting ready for your date.
- Listen to your date, as well as talk. It sounds really obvious, but your nerves can make it incredibly easy to just launch off into a spiel about life, the universe and everything. Unfortunately that can sound like you’re lecturing them, and that’s not a great start.
In general, focus on flirting and teasing as much as you’re comfortable with. If anything, try to focus on just having fun with that flirtiness and having fun – you’ll find the date far more fun if you’re able to relax enough to not take it particularly seriously. If you’re fun to be with, with a sense of humour and are able through your conversations to find common interests, you’re far more likely to both enjoy your date, and to get a second one.
Good luck!
Single men, dating advice